I’ve noticed a pattern in us human beings,
– beings that are so desperately starving to love and to be loved.
I’ve come to the conclusion that I cannot trust myself when it comes to romance and all that comes with the all consuming hunger for another’s affection. After fooling myself for long enough it’s apparent to see that often times the person we believe we love or just have high emotions for is not a real person. Often, they are an illusion, a caricature of an ideal partner that truly does not exist.
I know for one that I create scenarios in my head of me having an incredible- almost fantastical life with whoever I want to give my heart to. I inject this person with personality traits that they simply do not possess and cloud my delusional mind with false promises. What’s comical is that other people often point out logical issues and problems in the person I am so desperately pursuing but I do not react to it.
Instead, I try to justify their actions with reasons that do not exist.
I lie to myself, and desperately try to cling onto the image i’ve created of that person in my mind. It’s silly really, maybe even slightly insane.
But-
“What does the brain matter compared with the heart?”
― Virgina Woolf.
Logic is lost when one is consumed with love, even the most logical of people lose themselves when searching for their other half. This is a frightening yet beautiful thing that can be immensely deadly. I’ve realized to never trust myself when it comes to these things and to have faith in the people who I know truly love me. These people see the truth with no bias or infatuation.
With love,
Victoria, the Lioness under my skin.
A Haven For The Starving Artist 